silver lining appearing

PRAISE GOD!!!!

(there's no other way to say it..)

got a call from NTU for me to go down for an interview for bioscience!! WOOHOO i couldn't be more ecstatic!! i seriously thought i'd lost all chance to enter local uni.. thank God for the opportunity! 

and as i was trying to prepare for my interview, i checked my email and OH I PASSED MY PPT, like finally!!! even though it doesn't guarantee me a place anywhere it's just such a relief to have passed it after failing 3 times. it's valid for 2 years, so it does open up the PE option for me. YAY.

OKAY i wanna sleep early so i can be FRESH for my interview!!!

shall try and read up on some bio topics.. (now where are my bio notes?)

fresh start

it's about making the best of what i've been given. it's about being honest with myself and learning from my mistakes. it's about accepting the tough things that are said and making the change. 

it's gonna be a fresh start:)

rollercoaster to square one

i want to beat someone up. moe person called saying that the Ba offer was an "error". WHO MAKES MISTAKES FOR THIS SORTA THING?! it's not just my education path but my career at stake too thank you very much. GRRRR. and now because of this last min oops i have to send in appeal after appeal to try and get a place in uni somehow so i don't get stuck teaching here for another year. it's amazing how the one place that made me discover how much i enjoy teaching is also the one place which i face the most discouragement EVER, particularly in pursuing this career.

now is the time all to live up to all those larger-than-life remarks about "eirene shows great tenacity" that my teachers have showered on me thru the years of appraisals. thanks cher.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHH

whoever thought trusting God was easy is a fool (me). but having this security that He's with me is seriously the only thing keeping me from bursting into frustrated tears and wallowing in despair.

i'm sure there's a reason i've been put on this rollercoaster that leads to nowhere - well, at least i don't know where.

"I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"

uni update

i can totally use this photo to chase off unwanted suitors... or to promote my handsome brother! hahahaha

anyway i spent most of my waking hours today coming up with my written appeal letter to NTU, and photocopied a whole chunk of testimonials and cca records. oh and i gotta prepare for my test next fri! yes, the same PE test that i've failed 3 times, i've got a final super-last chance to pass it so they can offer me PE. so i'm hoping the appeal goes thru so i can study an academic degree first, but at the same time i'm hoping i'll pass the test so if the appeal fails i won't have to be a non-PE teacher.

spent some time on my knees today, it was good:)

back for good!

the retreat was great!!! glorious sky sea sun... batam is really lovely. although we only had this type of weather on like the first and last day we were there, the sunsets were always so awesome. photos on fb, not that i took any, there were enough cameras anyway.

there was alot of free and easy time, which we spent mostly in the pool, soaking up the chlorine; that i had to condition my hair like ALOT. i'm glad i managed to spend some time with the girls, and chat more to some of the chinese cong youth, it really does make you feel like the church is more united simply cuz of the fellowship. and i'm so happy i got to hang out with people my age too! not that i hate playing baby sitter of course;)

the resort was really awesome, even though the chalet we stayed in was like at the top of this enormous hill that we huffed and puffed up at least once a day. oh they have exceptional service! always impressed with awesome service staff. wish we had more time to explore the place, and do some of the water sports! didn't get to do much cuz most afternoons we were having sessions, and the weather was kinda cloudy anyway. 

OH but our speaker was great! Pastor Thomas seriously has a gift, no one would hear him and say he wasn't an engaging, thought-provoking, relevant speaker. he really brought across how we shouldn't be merely "running different softwares" for the various roles we play in life, who we are in Christ should permeate our entire living. okay gonna read the notes and take some practical action!! ;)

update

okay so you know i didn't clear my sch's assessment of my contract teaching right, which was for me to enter the diploma program in NIE (which i was gonna "upgrade" to a degree if i'd got it), but i had also applied seperately for an education degree at NIE/NTU as one of my uni choices. so we all assumed that the degree application would be affected as well, and i've been convinced since then that doing a regular academic degree would be best, and i could pursue a post-grad in education later if i wanted. yah well, guess what, i'm being offered the education degree at NIE. 

before you start congratulating me, allow me to explain the irony. merely 2 months ago i would've been ESTACTIC being accepted into NIE, but after the big disappointment i was all ready to change course and change direction, taking a break from Education (as a career, i mean). and then i end up being blown about back to square one, which i should've expected cuz it's what i had wanted when i indicated Education as my first 2 choices in degree courses.

so i sent out this email to ntu admissions office asking if i could appeal to change course, and michelle's gonna help me check my email and answer any calls on my behalf while i'm soaking up the sun in Batam. we'll see what happens in a week's time:)

who knew i'd change my mind after one major setback? maybe i'm right where i'm supposed to be.

back! again

leader's retreat was good, we had a full day of planning and eating:) very fruitful, but at the end, the entire week had left me so physically exhausted that i was literally FALLING asleep (like, falling over) the entire sunday morning.

btw FB is really annoying me cuz it's taking FOREVER just to upload my LTC pics cuz somehow the regular uploader isn't working. arghhh.

back!

it wasn't that bad la, LTC. tiring but fulfilling, in a way. learnt quite a bit on facilitation technique, plus met alot of young people! photo update and more soon, gotta pack for leaders retreat now and go!!!!

non-stop action begins today

3 camps in 2 weeks. all my friends and family, please tell me NOT to do this again (esp during precious holiday time). 

actually i think it's this first camp that is taking alot out of me. seriously i have outgrown disciplinary training camps. i just kinda lost the heart, that's why it's gonna be a painful 4 days ahead. let you know what happens when i'm all burnt and aching and tired on thurs evening...

i've yet to reveal to my parents that i'm leaving on friday again...

please pray for me not to fall ill!

night time scrabble

feel like such a board game geek! we hung out at edwin's place playing card version of monopoly, and later scrabble. taariq kept winning the monopoly and we didn't play points for scrabble so we kinda gave up after awhile. oh and this woman called up midway thru monopoly (it was a very slow 2nd round)

she should be so grateful i uploaded such a nice picture of her (courtesy of facebook of course). ok mel, next time we will rmb to call you for our impromptu and meaningless gatherings. 

calendar for next 2 weeks:

7-10 June (mon-thurs) LTC@JBAC (lim chu kang area)

11-13 June (fri-sun) SnP leaders retreat@JB

14-17 June (mon-thurs) BLC retreat!! @Batam

cool right. 3 camps in 2 weeks. leaving me ONE week of hols to unwind and prep for my last month in sch. hope i get the uni letter soon, hopefully before i leave for Batam. so i can send in my appeal letter if i'm rejected.

PACKING DAYS

LTC- 5 June/6 June evening

Leaders retreat- 11 June afternoon

BLC retreat- 13 June evening

HAIR/CUT

YAY i finally got my hair cut!!!! hahah after being inspired (ok, jealous) by my sister rebonding and cutting her hair, i went and had my long needed trim cuz those locks were getting pretty dry. and yea my tresses look pretty tame now cuz the guy blow-dried it so the ends don't stick out, but i don't really like this fake rebonded look cuz it feels older and more corporate somehow. i like my messy hair! haha. here, sideview!!

neat, huh? i'm so super happy cuz i cut my hair :D it's that pampered feeling i suppose. and my ponytail is so short and springy and happy! boo to my long and heavy and dreary horsetail of hair. heheh. YAY to new hair cuts!!

i love being on mc

but i seriously see the value of work.

i mean, if i were on holiday every day like this, i'll end up looking like this highly starchy carbohydrate staple.

today i decided to take my mum's advice and really use my mc to rest so i could get better from this cough with phlegm-sore throat-running nose which has been bugging me since LAST monday. it really is a terrible feeling to be ill, especially when you're not having a fever and you don't HAVE to rest at home (cuz everyone's paranoid about H1N1 and HFMD, which granted, are viable fears) so you decide to be all heroic and still go to work. alright i didn't have a choice at the peak of my phlegm-cough-no-voice stage cuz it was Meet The Parents and i didn't want to be that annoying newbie teacher who would choose that day of all days to fall sick.

but honestly, i'm really such a bum when i get a day off. like the most constructive thing i did today was to do the laundry! the rest was spent watching a home movie and a How  I Met Your Mother season 3 half marathon. hahaha. and since i'm sick i can't even get over the inertia of the gravity of the sofa by exercising. oh and my cough medicine causes drowsiness. which only the TV can overcome. i love being on mc. MUAHAHAHA.